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The battle I’m trying to fight…

“No one who has been emasculated by crushing or cutting may enter the assembly of the Lord.”
“No one born of a forbidden marriage nor any of their descendants may enter the assembly of the Lord, not even in the tenth generation.”

Deuteronomy 23:1-2 (NIV)

While reading the Scripture today,
I thought that someone whose testicles were crushed or whose penis was cut off would feel wronged, but when I read the commentary in the Living Life QT book, it seems that it was not a simple mistake or accident, but rather a result of the corrupt customs of Canaan. However, the parents were at fault for the illegitimate child, and the child was not at fault, so I thought that the illegitimate child would feel wronged.

God did not allow both of the above types of people to enter the assembly, and there is a clear reason why God did so.

Those who participate in the war of God that holy God fights must be holy. I can do whatever I want in the war that I fight with my own strength, but when I participate in the war that the holy God fights, I must be in accordance with God’s will.

My situation seems to have improved a little recently, but in reality, it is very difficult. I am worried that the big waves will come again and sweep everything away, and I feel frustrated. And I keep thinking about how to plan a war strategy and take up weapons.

I should leave the war to God and my job is to be pure before the Lord, but I keep trying to fight the war that God is fighting with my own strength.

“For they did not come to meet you with bread and water on your way when you came out of Egypt, and they hired Balaam son of Beor from Pethor in Aram Naharaim to pronounce a curse on you.” 
“However, the Lord your God would not listen to Balaam but turned the curse into a blessing for you, because the Lord your God loves you.”

Deuteronomy 23:4-5 (NIV)

“Do not despise an Edomite, for the Edomites are related to you. Do not despise an Egyptian, because you resided as foreigners in their country.” 
“The third generation of children born to them may enter the assembly of the Lord.”

Deuteronomy 23:7-8 (NIV)

The moment I read these Words, I thought, “God remembers to the end and repays to the end!”.
God kept the Ammonites and Moabites, who tried to hinder God’s people, from entering the assembly of God. On the other hand, the descendants of the Edomites and Egyptians after the third generation were allowed to enter the assembly.

God is the one who remembers until the end.
So I like God.

When I make a decision to be loyal and obedient to the Lord,
God remembers this to the end.

Tissues and Prayer

These days, when I pray alone at home, there is something I always do before praying. In the room where I currently live, the place where I usually pray is under the desk, and I clean that place with a tissue. Then I kneel down and pray.

Wiping it with a tissue doesn’t make much of a difference, and I know that God answers my prayers whether I do it or not. Also, I don’t wipe the floor with tissues because I’m afraid my pants will get dirty. I want to clean it up and pray because it is a place to pray to God.

“For the Lord your God moves about in your camp to protect you and to deliver your enemies to you. Your camp must be holy, so that he will not see among you anything indecent and turn away from you.”

Deuteronomy 23:14 (NIV)

Lord, Fight for Me

I had no energy today.
I don’t know why I’m so weak these days.
Maybe it’s because I’m tired of planning strategies and holding weapons to figure out how to fight a war that can only be won by God.

I leave it to you, Lord.
Please fight for me.
I know very well that I can never win with my own strength.
Please fight for me.

Please let this not be a battle that I win by a hair, but a wonderful victory because God is doing it. Please let me and everyone around me witness what God is doing today.

I will purify myself before God.
Please remember and don’t forget that I’m doing my best to be pure before you.

I look to you,
and believe in you,
and live today.

Thank you, Lord.